Now I'm worried

OK, I expected week 2 to be a rough week (1.5 pounds lost), but 0 pounds in week 3?!?!?!?!? What the *hell* is up with that? Here's the totals for week 3:

6 workouts

6.6 hours workout time

24.45 Miles

49028 steps (during workouts)

98539 steps (overall)

How could I have not lost *any* weight? Could I be adding that much muscle? Does anyone else have similar experiences in week 3? Yikes!

Today's playlist:

Do You Want To Touch Me - Gary Glitter

Kinda creepy, knowing Gary's well-publicized proclivities, but a great song nonetheless

I Feel Love - Donna Summer

Modern remix with a bass drum so deep it makes my teeth vibrate

Sussudio - Phil Collins

Some rip-offs are cheezy, some are inspired - this is an inspired ripoff of Prince's 1999.

Walk Idiot Walk - The Hives

So simple, even I can play the guitar parts

What It Is - Mark Knopfler

Clapton, Van Halen, Hendrix - all Gods, but if I could play like one guy, it would be this dude

Vertigo - U2

338 songs in my workout playlist and this is the 3rd time this has shown up - one of the few I won't skip over on a repeat

Fresh - Devo

Saw this live on the Stephen Colbert show

The Letter - Joe Cocker

Mad Dogs and Englishmen is still the greatest live album ever - (Kiss - Alive is #2 - shut up - you know it's great)

Viva Las Vegas - Bruce Springsteen

Hard to find single from the Honeymoon in Vegas soundtrack

Hold On - Ian Gomm

OK, not a workout song (AT ALL) - not sure how this got into my workout list

She Can't Dance - Marshall Crenshaw

First album is perfection - career (and songwriting) dropped off quickly after that

Reelin' In The Years - Steely Dan

Greatest guitar lick EVER

Hard Candy - Counting Crows

C'mon guys - 1 album every 6 years?

Blow Away - George Harrison

From George's lost years (late '70s)

Man-Sized Wreath - REM

I'll say it again: why isn't anyone talking about Accelerate? Great, great record

I'm Sick of Myself - Matthew Sweet

Back when ragged glory meant something

25 or 6 to 4 - Chicago

Cheezy, sure, but great anyway. Lead singer blew his brains out on a dare.

Responsibility

Think about the word responsibility. Break it down:

response - ability

The ability to respond (in an appropriate manner, is the implication). It has often been said that it's not what happens to us in life, but how we respond to it. Think about people who had *everything* and proceeded to piss it away (Hendrix, Belushi, et al.), and others who had nothing and carved out good (and sometimes great) lives for themselves. Next time something memorable happens in your life, stop and think about your response - many times, this effort takes no more than a second or two. You'll be surprised at how just putting this one or two second "filter" between your stimulus and response can *radically* alter the direction of your life.

Why am I thinking about this? The weigh-in did not go well.....

Yes, I even wrote about week 2 being the bad week and how I needed to prepare myself for a "bad" week. I knew not to expect a big number. I "knew" these things, but the 1.5 pound weight loss after the numbers I put up last week (7 workouts, 7.7 hours workout time, over 27 miles, etc, etc) was still disheartening. I even did the get off, get back on, get off, get back on, get off, get back on one more time dance to make sure - 1.5 pounds each time.

There were other reasons to not work out Sunday. It was a lazy day around our house - after the 2 weeks prior, I could have easily justified slacking off. Also, the football playoffs are going on here in the US and not only that, but my favorite team was playing (I rarely get to see them on TV here in Denver). It's common to munch on potato chips and soda, like you're at the movies while football is on here in the US (do Brits munch on crisps when Man U is playing?)

Also, the Sunday paper beckoned; chores needed to be done around the house; my daughter politely asked me to watch some bizarro cartoon. In short, it was a perfect storm....

I worked out anyway :)

I listened to the "filter" I had set up between my stimulus and response and it told me to do the right thing. And I did....

Yesterday's (Sunday's) numbers:
Time: 60 minutes; 3.60 miles, 3.7 MPH, 3.5% incline; 458 Cals burned

Today's (Monday's) numbers:
Time: 60 minutes; 3.60 miles, 3.7 MPH, 4.0% incline; 498 Cals burned

Tomorrow (early flight, client) is the first really big challenge. Wish me luck....


Too lazy to do a playlist review today.......

Goals are only motivating if you really believe you can reach them. Here are the goals I've set for myself:

1 - 10 consecutive days working out
Status: Achieved on 1/12/11/Wed

2 - 10 pounds lost
Status: At 7.5 pounds on 1/16 - (will hopefully hit at 1/23 weigh in)

3 - 42" pants size
Status: Achieved on 1/14/11/Fri

4 - 30 consecutive days working out
Status: 2/1 will be 30 days - today (1/17) was 15th consecutive day

5 - 20 pounds lost
Status: In progress

6 - 30 pounds lost - 40" pants size
Status: In progress

7 - 60 consecutive days working out
Status: In progress

8 - 40 pounds lost - 38" pants size
Status: In progress

9 - 100 consecutive days working out
Status: In progress

10 - Final weight goal (65 pounds lost - 36" Pants size)
Status: 7/1/11 set as goal date

Challenges and F-Bombs

I've got two big challenges facing me in the next couple of days:

1. The Sunday-morning weigh-in. I've designated Sunday morning as my "official" weigh-in time and I'm dreading the one coming up tomorrow. I've been pretty good with food, worked out all 7 days this week and gotten lots of sleep. Why in he world would I be dreading the weigh-in? The dreaded week 2 effect.

If you watch the Biggest Loser (US reality show where morbidly obese people compete to lose weight) the second week is always a bad week. They lose tons (sometimes seemingly inhuman amounts) of weight the first week, then almost nothing the second week. Surely their bodies are "adjusting" after losing a bunch of pounds the first week, but you're talking about people who are working out 4 hours with world-class trainers every day - that's 28 hours a week of intense training to sometimes only lose a pound or 2 in week 2. It's got to be heartbreaking to work out that hard and not lose weight. In week 3, their weight lose resumes again, but that 2nd week weigh in has to be a bitch to go thru.

The logical part of my brain tells me not to read too much into the number I get tomorrow, but the emotional side know how hard I worked this week and wants a big number. Wish me luck.

2. Travel. My client wants me to be at their site in Las Vegas next week. This poses a bunch of problems:

A: Las Vegas - food and buffets everywhere - yikes!

B: Stress - there's a lot going on with my client right now (a good thing), but that increases the stress level for everyone involved

C: Workout schedule - I fly out Tuesday morning and back home Thursday evening. I can work out in the hotel in the morning Wednesday and Thursday, but what about Tuesday? The way I see it, I have four choices:

i. Workout after work. It's going to be a busy day - I need to get up about 5am, get to the airport, fly to Vegas, get the rental car, drive to the client, be productive at the client for 8 hours, and check into the hotel. To workout after all that is going to be tough.

ii. Break my workout streak and recharge. Working out too much can cause strain on your body. A day of rest is not the worst thing in the world.

iii. Break my workout streak and "make up" the calories. The whole point is to make a consistent calorie deficit in your body to lose weight, right? I could skip the 600-800 calorie-burning workout but decrease my caloric intake for the day by the same amount (which would knock me down to about 1000 calories for the day - tough, but not impossible, especially if it's just for one day).

iv. Stop thinking about all of this too much and just enjoy life.

I'm leaning towards i. What do you think?

If you have an iPod Shuffle and plug it in to your MacBook (or PC) to recharge it, you lose the ability to scroll back through what you've listened to. I've lost today's playlist, so I've created a list of songs with the F-Bomb in them (in reverse order of awesomeness). Enjoy!

10. Makes Me Wonder - Maroon 5

There's three reasons for dropping an F-Bomb in a song: you either want to express a very powerful emotion (and no other word will do), you want to shock people or you're pathetically trying to be "hip" and cool. There's no other reason for the F-Bomb in this song than the third.

9. Hey Jude - The Beatles

Undoubtedly the greatest song on the list, but only gets the #9 spot because it's unintentional. At about 2:57 into the song, Lennon misses a cue to sing background and clearly says, "Ohhhhhh, fucking hell".

8. Fuck The Police - N.W.A.

Great music can be inspired by a full range of human emotions. While I certainly don't agree with such strong sentiment against people who put themselves in the line of fire each and every day, I understand where this rage comes from.

7. Adios Hermanos - Paul Simon

Yes, Paul Simon actually wrote a song with the F-Bomb in it. From his failed attempt at writing a Broadway play" Songs From The Capeman

6. Porno Star - Buckcherry

Great song, but a very conventional use of the F-Bomb. You need more creativity to score higher on this list.

5. Plaistow Patricia - Ian Dury

Dury is an acquired taste. His cockney warbling strikes most as either fingernails on a blackboard or great, emotive, untrained rock-and-roll singing in the spirit of Bob Dylan and David Byrne. For 1977, singing about the horrors of drug use was still pretty radical.

4. Who Are You - The Who

Again, a pretty traditional use of the F-Bomb, but captures the swagger that Townshend was trying to re-capture as punk and Disco were trying to kill traditional "heavy" rock in the late '70s.

3. Battle Of Who Could Care Less - Ben Folds Five

On the surface, it might sound like Folds was stuck for a two-syllable word to keep the meter in the bridge, but the throwaway nature of it fits perfectly with song's content. Subtly awesome.

2. I Am An Animal - Pete Townshend

Keith Moon's death hit Townshend really hard and he dealt with it the way all great artists do - by turning it into great art. Empty Glass was Pete's last really great album and freed from the macho, kick-your-teeth-in image of The Who, is filled with introspective heart-wrenching songs. He screams the F-Bomb in this song - it's truly the sound of a man's heart breaking, captured live on vinyl.

1. Working Class Hero - John Lennon

Lennon meant to shock when he put this in the song (twice). He actively let himself be portrayed as an "ex-Beatle" rather than a Beatle who was recording solo albums. He was trying to strip away every aspect of his life and become someone else. Impossible to forget after you've heard it.

Special Mentions:

Piece of Shit Car - Adam Sandler

Sandler's OK is small doses - didn' make the list since the F-Bomb is used for humorous purposes.

Fuck The British Army - Traditional Irish Folk Song

It's no secret that Andrew Dice Clay stole most of his dirty nursery rhymes from chants American soldiers would sing while training. This song is one of the earliest in that grand tradition.

Walking!

"If there's more than 4 people engaging in an activity in this country, you can bet there's a magazine devoted to it. Walking! WALKING! The a magazine called WALKING! Wow, the new Walking is here - look, hon: a story about repeatedly putting one foot in front of the other!" - George Carlin

Excuses are insidious. They affect every aspect of your life. Very few of us have the true courage *not* to make them. When it comes to exercise, we all make them (and believe me, I have a Master's Degree in this area). Here's what I've been doing to fight them:

1. I have physical pain when I exercise

Try walking. It shouldn't hurt that much to just walk (unless you have a serious injury). Two stories:

a. In the US, there's a reality show called "The Biggest Loser" where people compete to lose weight. Every year, they get bigger and bigger people to be on the show. This year there's a guy that was 646 pounds (293 Kg / 46.1 stone). He walks as his exercise - that's basically all he *can* do. Sure enough, he's losing weight.

b. Back in the 1940's, my grandmother contracted Rheumatic Fever - it wasn't diagnosed or treated properly and it left her almost completely paralyzed. My grandfather had to "fend for himself" and for the last 50 years of his life, lived on a diet of fried hot dogs, home made french fries, picked pigs feet (as gross as it sounds) and ice cream (and lots of alcohol, but that's besides the point). He never went above 175 pounds his entire life. How did he do it? He always had three dogs in our house - when one died, he got another one right away. He walked those dogs three times a day every single day of his life - snow, rain, wind, cold - it didn't matter a lick to him - he walked them EVERY SINGLE DAY - despite his lifestyle choices in food and drink, he never saw a doctor and lived to be 87.

2. I don't have time

This one is pure BS - everyone on the planet has exactly 1,440 minutes each and every day - no more, no less. We don't have equal opportunity, equal physical characteristics, equal support and upbringing - the one thing that we all have is the equal amount of time. It you really think you don't have time, change something in your life so that you do.

3. I sweat too much

I put this in here because it's a personal albatross of mine. I sweat when I work out. A LOT. Like, an unbelievable amount. Lunch time is the best time for me to work out, but if I'm at a client (unless they have a shower at their facility), I'm out of luck. The solution goes back to #2 - make time to do it. A lot of gyms have 1 or 2 week memberships to "try things out" - if I'm at a client for a week or two, I'll join for the minimum period and work out there over lunch - if that's not an option, I suck it up and work out before I go in (I'm not a morning person and I *HATE* working out first thing in the morning, but I *can* do it for a short period.

4. I don't like seeing other people see me like this in the gym

This is a tough one. I understand this completely. There's a water park here in Denver that my daughter *loves* to go to, but I *HATE* with a passion because I have to walk around other people in a bathing suit. There's no easy way around this one, but there are a few things you can do to mitigate the effects:

a. Get flattering workout gear

b. Exercise outside - there are lots of people who jog in Portland and Seattle, so weather is no excuse

c. Buy a home gym - I put his last because it such a cliche to see exercise equipment in garage sales used for a week or month and then never touched again.

5. I'll just skip a day. I'm at the point where I'm actually afraid to skip a day, for fear that it'll lead me down the path of my old self. If you want to skip a day, do it for the right reasons, not just because you don't "feel like it".

Today's numbers:
Time: 60 min

Distance: 3.60 miles

Speed: 3.7 mph

Incline: 4%

Avg HR: 126

Calories: 664

Back to the high-energy workout music:

Todd Rundgren - Bang On The Drum All Day

Another blogger wrote that this song was about masturbation. I don't hear it.

John Mellencamp - Authority Song

Mellencamp and Meg Ryan? Stranger pairings have made it work.

Tom Petty - Even The Losers

What a great, great rock and roll song. Steve Jobs picked this song when he was first demoing the iPad.

Lucas - Lucas With The Lid Off

Another one of those "how-did-I-ever-even-hear-this-song?" songs.

Bob Seger - Betty Lou's Gettin' Out Tonight

Even when Seger's not really trying (Against The Wind is pretty flaccid), he's still better than 99% of what's on radio today here in the US.

Knack - Your Number or Your Name

Their first album is a masterpiece - they could've easily had 5 or 6 singles off of it. This one defined "power pop" in the 80's

John Mayer - Bigger Than My Body

Title alone makes it a great workout song.

Billy Joel - Downeaster Alexa

Joel drifts into pomp and sentimentality far too often for my taste, but this song pulls it off (sort of - couldn't have it in heavy rotation)

Phish - Down With Disease

Will respect to the Grateful Dead and Widespread Panic, Phish is still the ultimate jam band. Still kicking myself for not seeing them at Red Rocks on their farewell tour.

U2 - Vertigo

Like Lenny Kravitz's Dig In, sometimes you just need a straight-ahead nothing-fancy rock-and-roll song to get you through the day.

Ben Folds 5 - Battle of Who Could Care Less

Ben Folds 5 is, and always has been, a trio. Another song with the f-bomb in it. (Mental note: start working on f-bomb song list for future posting)

Tom Jones - Sex Bomb

Oh dear God! Wife had never heard this song, so she watched video on youtube. Had to physically restrain herself from vomiting watching old man Jones gyrate amongst nubile beauties. Will occasionally randomly jump in front of television and gyrate to chorus for wife's entertainment.

Pete Townshend - Rough Boys

Great, great song, but still wonder what the Who (even with Kenney Jones) could have done with this.

Fall Out Boy - America's Suitehearts

"I'm in love with my own sins". Aren't we all, brother; aren't we all.....

Michael Jackson - Jam

Perfect beats-per-minute for my workout. Posthumous releases are the epitome of creepy.

Hives - Walk Idiot Walk

Side one of Tyrannosaurus Hives is the best record I've heard in the last 10 years.

Clash - Police On My Back

The Clash win "Best-4-Consecutive-Albums" of all time with The Clash, Give 'Em Enough Rope, London Calling and Sandinista! (although side 6 of Sandinista! should replace water-boarding as an interrogation technique). Next is Rubber Soul, Revolver, Sgt Pepper and The Beatles (Magical Mystery Tour doesn't count since it was a hodgepodge of singles and B-sides and was never intended as a "proper" album) and third is Dark Side of the Moon, Wish You Were Here, Animals and The Wall. The Clash win because their 4-album masterpiece is really 7 albums (8 if you count the re-mastered London Calling in 2007).

Filter - Hey Man, Nice Shot (Remix)

Not the original, but the insane remix with the horns and the drum machine. Made a classic even better.

The Dirty Little Secret of Weight Loss

A couple of years ago, a book came out called "The Secret". If you haven't read it and don't want to know what the "secret" is, skip down to the next paragraph. The secret can be summed up as this: to become the person you want to be, surround yourself with those types of people. You want to be fit and sexy? Hang around with fit and sexy people. Rich? Hang around with wealthy people. Spiritual? You get the idea....

There's an insidious, dirty little secret about weight loss and it's one no one talks about. Sure, everyone talks about the obvious things: you'll be healthier, your clothes will fit better, you'll have more energy, you'll have more confidence, etc, etc. All of these are true, but they usually don't make an emotional impact with people trying to lose weight, because that's what *everybody* says - hearing the same thing over and over, no matter how positive and uplifting, makes anything lose its emotional impact after a while (anyone whose told a child over and over to make their bed or clean their room knows what I'm talking about).

But there is one thing nobody says about weight loss that everybody knows to be true: people treat you differently when you're fat. "Wow, no shit" you might be saying to yourself, but I'm not talking about the surface, I'm-less-likely-to-ask-that-person-out way of treating someone different. In fact, I'm not talking about sexual attraction at all - I'm talking about a fundamental way of interacting with other human beings who are overweight. Take a look at some truly, truly horrible people: Kim Kardashian and Paris Hilton. Would *anyone* put up with the crap they inflict on the world if they didn't look they way they did? Would someone like Abraham Lincoln (not fat, but truly one of the ugliest men in all of world history) have even the slightest chance of rising to any sort of meaningful public office today?

The TV show Dateline did an experiment a couple of years ago where they sent two women in for a job interview for a bank manager position. One was frumpy, but had much better experience and qualifications; the other was fit and more attractive, but much less qualified. The hiring manager (a man), talked about how hard the job would be to the frumpy woman and what a great addition to the office she would be to the fit woman.

Again, you're probably thinking, "No shit - men are pigs". Would it surprise you to note that they did the exact same experiment with a woman hiring manager and got the same results? Here's the part of the story that really made an emotional impact for me - when they interviewed the male hiring manager later on, he didn't try to make excuses or blow off the whole thing as an aberration - he easily could have been a jerk and said, oh well, that's just the "way of the world". But his reaction stunned me - he was truly horrified at his own behavior. He watched the (concealed) videotape and listened to his own words and you could see the look in his eyes and actually feel his pain. He was truly ashamed at what he had done.

What does this tell me? It is so ingrained in our DNA to treat overweight people as "lesser" people, no amount of "education" or pleas for compassion and understanding will *ever* change that. It's a harsh sentiment, but the only way out of it is to leave the overweight tribe. The dirty little secret can be summed up as thus:

You may think it will only affect your romantic life, but your interactions with other people - ON EVERY LEVEL - will dramatically improve when you lose weight.

Ear fatigue. It sounds like a made up thing, but it's real. It's often experienced by musicians or those working in music studios. It's the condition of losing one's ability to distinguish subtle differences in music after listening to the same music (or type of music) for extended periods of time. In that vein, I decided to take a break from the high-energy, heart-pumping music I've been listening to my last set of workouts and switch to a "mellow mix" for today's workout. First, the numbers:

Time: 78 minutes (30% increase to help burn off the Chicken McNuggets I had yesterday)

Distance: 4.56 miles

Avg Heart Rate: 126 BPM

Calories burned: 871

Speed: 3.6 mph

Incline: 4.5 %

Tuesday's Gone - Lynyrd Skynyrd

It's tough to find artists today with the range to write boot-stompers like "Saturday Night Special" and "The Needle and the Spoon" and tender songs like this one. Namesake (Leonard Skinner, their high-school gym teacher) just died a few months ago.

Ordinary Miracle - Fisher

Beautiful cover version of Sarah McLaughin's original. Featured in a pharmacy commercial here in the US.

Dimming Of The Day - Five Blind Boys Of Alabama

Another cover version; this time of the insanely great (and also insanely ignored) Richard Thompson. Gives new meaning to the work "haunting".

Over and Over - Fleetwood Mac

The best make out song ever. And speaking of making out, who the came came up with the term "heavy petting"? Worst term for sex, EVER! Sounds like something your vet has to do every couple of months.

This Heart - Nanci Griffith

Folk cutie gets Larry Mullen and Adam Clayton from U2 to lay down the groove.

The Air That I Breathe - Hollies

Oh my God! - syrupy strings, groan-inducing lyrics, grossly overproduced glop. Mix all ingredients = freaking awesome. Fuck you, I can't explain it.

Copperline - James Taylor

JT is still good for one great song every album. (Do they still say "album" anymore?)

Vincent - Don McLean

You might know this as "Starry, Starry Night". Heartbreaking song about Vincent Van Gogh. Reading his biography is an exercise in pain and misery.

Long As I Can See The Light - CCR

Creedence once released three albums in a 12 month period - can you imagine any artist doing that today?

Cello Song - Nick Drake

Let me be clear: Nick Drake was a God. If you've never heard of him, you may know him from the Pink Moon Volkswagon commercials (in the US anyway) from a few years ago. He recorded 3 albums and then dropped dead of a heart attack (possibly drug induced) at 26. Gives new meaning to the phrase "achingly beautiful".

Love In Store - Fleetwood Mac

The magic was gone after "Tusk", but the Mac still had a few good songs left in them in the 80s.

Give Me Love (Live) - George Harrison

Yoko gets most of the blame for the Beatles not getting back together in the '70s (and she deserves some of it), but George did a lot to make sure it never happened, too. This one was from his tribute concert. The love shown to his songs by his fellow musicians is remarkable.

Casey Jones - Grateful Dead

Is there a song that better personifies the late 60s-San Francisco-drug culture than this? I think not.

Save Me - k.d. lang

Second best make out song ever (see "Over and Over" above)

Blue - Jayhawks

I had never heard of them before this song (or since). Never has two-part harmony sounded so wonderful.

Is This Love - Bob Marley

"Over and Over" from the male point of view.

Holding Back The Years - Simply Red

Quite simply, the saddest song ever. Close second: The Band - It Makes No Difference

Purple Heather - Van Morrison

Everyone knows Moondance and Brown Eyed Girl, but Van has created so many jaw-droppingly great songs over the years, it's a crime more people don't know about them. This gem is a re-write of an old Irish folk ballad called "Wild Mountain Thyme". The album this is off of (Hard Nose The Highway) is out of print - just about the only place you can hear it is here.

Sullivan Street - Counting Crows

An artist's debut album is usually one of two things: polished and great because they've been performing their set of songs and refining them for a long time (think The Cars debut album) or they're a work-in-progress because they don't have their songwriting chops down yet (think the Eagles first three albums). The Crows fall into the former category - August and Everything After is uniformly great from beginning to end and this song is the apex of yearning.

Why food addiction is the worst addiction

Oh boy, I know I'm going to stir up a shit-storm with this one.....

Yes, I believe food addiction is the worst addiction you can have and not just because *I* have it.

Before you jump down my throat, hear me out.

There are several things about being a food addict that "other" addictions don't have to deal with:

1. People know you're a food addict the *second* they meet you. There's no way to hide it - the second they lay eyes on you, they know. If you're an alcoholic, drug addict, sexaholic or compulsive gambler, you don't present that to new people the second you meet them (unless you're *really* in bad shape). Right from the start, people are judging you.

2. Nobody takes food addiction seriously. Modern society has evolved to the point where most addictions are recognized and accepted - maybe a little too recognized (middle-child syndrome? Really?). But, almost no one treats food addiction seriously. Most people still think of it as a willpower issue.

3. Fat people are funny. It's hard to justify making jokes at just about any group in 2011. Think about it, when was the last time someone openly joked about/laughed at African-Americans, Jews, the mentally challenged, et al (other than from within their own group, which seems to be OK)? I haven't heard a Polish joke in 25 years. Yes, yes, I know they're out there, but not in a mixed-company sort of way. Fat people, however, are still fair game and I don't see this changing anytime soon.

4. The whole black and white issue. Very few things in life are black and white (and by that I mean good/bad, right/wrong, holy/evil, etc.) no matter how hard political and religious leaders try to make them out to be. But with most addictions, there *is* a black and white line - engage in the behavior, you've messed up and need to start healing again; abstain from the behavior, collect your 100-days-clean chip. Food presents no such clear-cut choices - what constitues failure? Does eating a Twinkie mean you've fallen off the wagon? (If your answer to that is yes, read this). You can starve yourself down to 500 calories a day and do more damage to your body than good.

5. Availability. Food is everywhere. To shop, you still need to get up and go to the mall. For sex, you still need to get out there and convince someone to go to bed with you. There's still *effort* involved. Unless you live in a really rural area, you probably have a convenience store within a mile or two of your house. And sometimes you just can't avoid it - when was the last time you stopped for gas and didn't find a store attached to the gas station stocked to the brim with cheap junk food? Buffets used to be limited to Vegas to draw in gamblers - now every town with more than 50 people has a Chinese buffet in it. There are entire TV networks devoted to the preparation and consumption of food: 24/7/365.

How have I been dealing with these pressures? It's been 10 days, so I'm certainly no expert, but here's how I've been dealing with each of the above points:

1. Tell yourself that other people's judgements are a reflection on them, not you.

“When we judge or criticize another person, it says nothing about that person; it merely says something about our own need to be critical.” - Unknown

2. Fundamentally, it's not important whether other people accept food addiction as real or not - there are people who still walk around calling little people midgets and see no reason to change, even if asked politely. Focus on the people who support you and forget the rest - life is too short.

3. To a certain extent, you have to laugh at yourself. Unless you have a true metabolic disorder (which are very rare), we all did this to ourselves through bad choices. People will always be insensitive and very few comedians spend their entire act on fat people. Laughing stimulates lots of good things in your body and seems to strengthen the immune system.

4. Embrace the "grayness" of life. I'm always amazed at how many people are not only willing, but actually seem to crave other people to tell them how to think or behave. How many people listen to political programs on TV and the radio (that only talk about one side of the issue) and are consumed by them? How many people are convinced their religion is right and everyone else is not only wrong, but will burn in eternity? Other than a *very* few things, NOTHING is black and white in this world - NOTHING. Seeking out black and white ways of interacting with the 7 billion people on this planet is a sure recipe for unhappiness. In other words, enjoy the cheeseburger - just try to cut out a few calories and/or exercise a little bit more tomorrow.

5. The toughest one (for me at least). What has worked for me so far in 2011 is to tie this one with other goals I've set for myself. For instance: buying junk food at the gas station also affects my money and time goals for the year. Eating junk food around my daughter affects my parenting goals. By tying together multiple goals, I've been able to stay focused - the cravings are going away and the habits are getting reinforced little-by-little each day.

Today's numbers:

Time: 60min Distance: 3.50 mi Avg Heart Rate: 122bpm Calories: 631 Speed: 3.6mph Incline: 4%

Today's playlist:

Bruce Springsteen - Rosalita (Live)

Wow - the E Street Band was *fierce* back in the day. Recorded at the Hammersmith Odeon in '75

Tori Amos - Blue Skies

Listened to the lyric over and over - no idea what she's talking about.

Van Halen - Panama

The best VH song ever. Other contenders? (Any comments with Sammy Hagar singing lead gets you banned from the site).

Pete Townshend - Cat's In The Cupboard

After Moon's death, Pete had one great album left in him. Unfortunately, it wasn't a Who album - Empty Glass is still raw 25 years later.

Apollo 440 - Stop The Rock

This should be the National Hockey League's theme song.

Hives - Abra Cadaver

I would have called this song "93 Seconds of Fury".

Bon Jovi - It's My Life

Arena rock at its most glorious.

Michael Jackson - Beat It

Thriller would've been great without this song. With it, it's almost inhuman.

Culture Club - Sufferagette City

A weird one - I have no idea where I even might have heard this version.

K7 - Come Baby Come

Another weird one - I don't listen to hip-hop (or whatever the kids are calling it these days), so I have no idea how these even got on my playlist. Good groove; nasty, nasty lyrics.

Rancid - You Don't Care Nothin'

Three chords and the truth, baby - three chords and the truth.

Fun Lovin' Criminals - The Fun Lovin' Criminal

FLC was never big in the US; not sure why - some things just don't translate well.

Beastie Boys - Sure Shot

Transformed themselves from snot-nose rap-punks into legitimate artists. Awesome.

REM - Living Well Is The Best Revenge

Accelerate is the best album nobody's talking about. Solid from beginning to end.

Midnight Oil - Bullroarer

In 1984, I saw the Clash at Brendan Byrne Arena in New Jersey - the best concert EVER. Midnight Oil on Pier 39 in New York City was a close second.

Green Day - Burnout

So many great workout songs. How in the world did they pull off American Idiot?

Where does motivation come from?

The mantra "If you believe that you can do something, or if you believe you can't do something, you're right" has become such a cliche, but I really believe it's 100% accurate. Yes, things will get in your way and no matter how hard you try to plan for them you'll still run up against them.

But where does that spark come from? For me it was the serendipitous fusion of a bunch of different things:

1. A dear friend of mine has lost 80 pounds. I had lunch with her a couple of weeks ago and she "glowed" - not in some metaphysical BS kind of way; I mean it seemed like she literally glowed during our lunch. I left that lunch with her with a ton of admiration for her - and a belief that I could experience those feelings for myself.

2. I started working out in mid-December. Why is this significant? I was hoping to get a 2 week head start on the traditional New Year's resolution. What happened was the exact opposite - I had to stop after 2 workouts because of blisters so big (on the bottom of my right foot and on the heel of my left foot) I couldn't even walk, much less work out. Over the last two weeks of December, the blisters healed, toughened up the skin at those pressure points and I was ready to go full steam on 1/1.

3. For the last three months, I've been working (basically) from home. No commute time means more time to comfortably fit working out into my schedule.

4. I had one of those "Oh, crap!" moments a few weeks ago. I was in my local Sam's Club (for those out of the US, Sam's Club is one of those huge warehouse stores where you can buy a year's worth of Macaroni and Cheese (if that's what you're into)) and I was excited that they now carry clothing for men that goes up to size 3X. Hey, that's my size! I can buy crappy clothing at Sam's Club now! Then I caught myself - THIS is what I'm getting excited about? Oh, crap! It made me think of Bill Cosby talking about bending over to pick up a towel after taking a shower and having a half a cup of water pour out of his belly button. That's one of those "Oh, crap!" moments.

5. Chance favors a prepared mind. None of the above probably would have been enough to get me going, but because I was thinking about it, when it all did happen, I was ready for it. The motivational speaker Anthony Robbins talks about creating an "emotional flood" for yourself, where you list all the reason to "must" change and "flood" yourself with all of the positive (or negative, if that's what motivates you) messages surrounding the change you want to make.

6. Have lots of tools in your toolbelt. If you needed to hire someone to work on your home, would you hire the best worker with a screwdriver in the world (who didn't know how to use any other tool) or would you hire someone who was pretty good with a range of tools. I needed more that one form of motivation to get me focused - just using one motivational tool is bound to fail you - have as many at your disposal as you can.

Today's workout numbers:

Time: 60 min

Distance: 3.44 miles

Speed: 3.5 mph

Incline: 3.5%

Avg HR: 116

Calories: 568

Today's playlist:

M - Moderne Man

Remember Pop Muzik? M was a guy named Robin Scott - his first album wasn't too bad, actually. After U2 used Pop Muzik in the "Pop" tour, he suddenly was in fashion again. He re-recorded some of his old songs - this one got a complete makeover.

Toasters - Two Tone Army

How to describe ska to someone who's never heard it? Try blending punk and reggae - that's ska. Great song from another one-hit wonder.

Paul McCartney - Getting Closer

Has any woman ever been enchanted by being called a salamander? I didn't think so.

Paul McCartney - Jet

Heard this yesterday - damn shuffle feature!

Paul McCartney - Too Many People

Three McCartney songs in a row? WTF? My friend Gregg (three G's, thank you) insists Harrison was the most talented Beatle instrumentally, to which I say, "Bollocks" - McCartney played all of the instruments on McCartney and Ram, did the solo on Taxman when Harrison couldn't nail it, did the drums on Back In the USSR, did a guitar solo on Maybe I'm Amazed that every guitarist should study and did the swampy organ lick on Come Together. Big Macca wins hands down.

Foo Fighters - The Pretender

Where did all of the great guitar-based bands go? In America, you can listen to pop radio for hours without hearing a single guitar. Sigh.

KC & The Sunshine Band - Get Down Tonight

Danced to this song on my honeymoon cruise. Haven't danced in public since.

Stevie Wonder - Signed, Sealed, Delivered

Wow. Greatness personified.

Maroon 5 - Makes Me Wonder

In theory, I should hate Maroon 5 - slick, overproduced, empty pop music. But damn, I love this song. Another radio-friendly song with the f-bomb in it.

Van Halen - Dance The Night Away

I despise David Lee Roth as a person, but the only incarnation of VH worth listening to was when he was at the helm. For some reason, I always thought this was a cover version, but nope - it's an original.

Bongos - Numbers With Wings

Local boys (Hoboken, NJ) with a special place in my heart. No bongos on any of their songs.

MAARS - Pump Up The Volume

Back when sampling songs was considered cutting edge. Still cracks me up when the Indian sample plays.

Lenny Kravitz - Dig In

Sometimes a straight-ahead, nothing-fancy rock and roll song is what you need.

Meat Loaf - All Revved Up With No Place To Go

Everybody knows Paradise By The Dashboard Light and Two Out Of Three Ain't Bad, but this is the real gem from Mr. Loaf's debut. Best saxophone sound ever.

Bruce Cockburn - Tie Me At The Crossroads

Falls into the not-really-a-workout-song category. Great, great underrated singer.

Ricky Martin - Livin La Vida Loca

Great song to finish your workout to. Any guitar solo solely on the 6th string is OK in my book.

The Journey

I *so* wanted to call my blog "Notes from the Overfed", but I'm obviously not the only one who's read Woody Allen's short stories, as there are numerous blogs out there with that title, so I've decided to combine two things I'm focusing on in 2011: Weight Loss and Music.

I've been inspired by lots of people including this blog. I know the person who writes that blog and I admire her a great deal.

I am hoping that writing this will accomplish three things:

1. It will inspire others - as you will see, if I can do it *anybody* (and I do mean *anybody*) can

2. It will keep me on track - I've tried and failed to lose weight countless times before - if these posts ground and focus me, I hope to increase my chances of success.

3. It will put me in touch with others who are on the "journey"

Here's my story:

I am Fat:

I have always been fat - I can never remember a time when I didn't feel fat.

I am Fat and Old:

I am 44 and don’t want to be Fat and 50.

I am Fat, Old and Unhealthy:

I have serious sleep apnea and I use a CPAP machine. I have hypertension and I take blood pressure medication. I couldn't run a mile if my life depended on it. I can't walk up a flight of stairs without huffing and puffing. I am lucky in the sense that my genetics seem to be OK - (grandparents lived into 80s, parents still alive), but every measure of health shows that I am below the average for my age.

I am fat, Old, Unhealthy and Undisciplined.

I don’t do the things my friends do because they are fit - they bike, they ski and they hike - I live in Colorado, so these activities are practically mandatory. I want to do these things but pretend I don’t care. If I was thin I could get fit and then I could join in. I am disciplined in many aspects of my life - but when it comes to food and exercise, I am pathetic.

I am fat, Old, Unhealthy, Undisciplined and a Bad Role Model.

When my daughter was born, I swore I wouldn't be one of those dads to tired at the end of the day to do anything. Guess where I am today.

Here are the (ugly) starting stats:

Age: 43 (44 on 1/26)

Height: 6' 0"

Weight: 253 (115 Kg or 18 stone)

Resting Pulse: 84

BP: 135/90

The Goal:

Date: 7/1/11

Weight: 190 (86.2 Kg or 13.5 stone)

Resting Pulse: 70

BP: 120/80

As of today (1/10/11/Monday), I have worked out for 7 straight days and lost 6 pounds. Yes, yes - I know - don't expect that type of weight loss to continue. My goal is 2 pounds per week.

My stats for the first week (first 6 workouts):

Miles: 21.22

Time: 6.2 hours

Cal Burned: 4036

I use a heart monitor when I work out, so I'm hoping the Calories Burned number is pretty accurate.

The second part of this blog will deal with my thoughts about the music I listen to while I work out via my iPod Nano set to "Shuffle" mode. Here's the list from my last workout session:

Two Tickets To Paradise - Eddie Money

I didn't like Eddie Money that much when I was a teenager, but I seem to like him a lot more now. Funny how that works. Same thing happened to me with broccoli and James Joyce.

I Ran - A Flock Of Seagulls

80's kitsch at it's best - bought their debut album for this song and "Telecommunication". Greatest rock and roll haircut of all time.

It Can Happen - Yes

Not a traditional workout song, but great nonetheless. 90125 was so out of character for them - must have seen how Asia was able to make art-rock radio friendly.

Country Roads - Toots and the Maytals

For those of you unaware, Toots and the Maytals are a legendary reggae band, second only to Bob Marley in greatness. I heard their cover of this old John Denver song on an episode of "My Name Is Earl". Great vocals - reminds me of the pure joy in Sachmo's What A Wonderful World.

Rosemary - Dickies

I used to be a DJ at my college radio station - I had this in heavy rotation.

Don't Stop 'Til You Get Enough - Michael Jackson

The perfect workout song - the beats per minute matches my pace exactly. Best lines in Hot Tub Time Machine

[Wondering if they've traveled back in time]

Nick: "What color is Michael Jackson?"

Confused 1980's girl:"Black?"

[Nick runs out in horror]

I Zimbra - Talking Heads

One of the great nonsensical songs of all time. Rubber Biscuit and Come Together also make the list. Go ahead and google the lyrics - I dare ya.

Do Ya Know What I Mean - Lee Michaels

It must be tough to be a one-hit wonder. Lee used to perform with just himself on piano and a drummer.

Champagne Supernova - Oasis

Again, not a traditional workout song, but so freaking great, it really gets my heart pumping.

Once In A Lifetime - Talking Heads

If I could only play one song to show the Heads greatness, this would be it. An incredibly close second would be Life During Wartime. Sorry haters; Burning Down the House isn't even in my Top 10.

Who Are You - The Who

Without a doubt, the most played song on the radio with the work "fuck" in it. Roger says it a couple of times actually. Weird trivia: Lennon clearly says "Oh fucking hell" right before one of the choruses of Hey Jude.

Jet - Paul McCartney

Great song, but I had to speed it up a little bit with this tool.

Special - Garbage

Gavin Rossdale, the guy married to Gwen Stefani, once said that Shirley Manson is the sexiest woman in music - hard to disagree.

Save Yourself - Stabbing Westword

Unbelievably great song from a band I know absolutely nothing about - couldn't name another one of their songs if you paid me.

Honky Tonk Women - Rolling Stones

Third dirtiest song ever written by the Stones behind Sparks Will Fly and Tie You Up.

No Reply At All - Genesis

Genesis Greatest Hits CD does not have this song on it - how it that possible? Other glaring omission: Got To Get You Into My Life isn't on the 1962-1966 Beatles collection - a travesty!

Alabama Getaway - Grateful Dead

The most un-Grateful Dead song they ever recorded - if you like it, buy the single - the album (Go To Heaven) is one of their weakest.